Once upon a time (May 4, 2020 to be exact)…
…There was a book that launched. Mostly.
This has been quite the week. It’s been such a mix of joy and sadness, rejoicing and disappointment. After almost 6 years of writing, of waiting, of praying, of working, of researching, of refining, that anticipated book launch day arrived. But it wasn’t as I expected it to be.
Yes, the digital book made it out into the world! But rather than the joyous news that the printed books were on their way to me and to others, I awoke to find that due to the ripple effects of COVID-19 they were going to be delayed, and with no indication of how long. And there was literally nothing I could do to change it.
I won’t lie, it was a really tough pill to swallow. After years of dreaming about this day, it just felt so… wrong. I know that in light of the tragedies that so many are facing due to this pandemic it is a very small matter. Yet, the surrender was still hard.
As I’ve laid all these things with tears before the Lord, He has brought back to mind some of the countless ways He has sanctified me through this process of bringing Expectant into the world. And oddly enough, it seems very fitting that He would allow my plans to be changed and control be taken out of my hands so that yet again He can demonstrate that this book is His – for Him and His glory alone.
One thing I’ve come to learn is that every time God has asked me to wait in the process of publishing this book, there is something He is doing that I cannot fully see. Sometimes those reasons have remained unknown, but He has allowed me to catch enough glimpses into the “why” that my trust in His timing has been strengthened significantly. My trust still isn’t perfect, but I know that His timing is.
I don’t know exactly how much longer the waiting will be (and who knows, by the time you read this the waiting may be over). But I do know that God is faithful. He has been faithful every single moment of this journey, and He will continue to be long after this book is in print. So, as imperfect as this launch may be, I pray that every person who reads Expectant will know more deeply how perfect and loving and good and kind our great God is.
I cannot express my thanks enough for all of those who have encouraged, supported, and cheered me on in this process. You’ve helped me rejoice in the Lord and His work this week, and for that I am so, so grateful. As I shared in my Acknowledgements, “Without [God] there would have been no book to write.”