I sat listening to a few women in the room tell about their experience with breech birth.
Because It’s not a normal ordeal, it is naturally intriguing to hear everyone else’s story. Sometimes though, those stories (breech birth or otherwise) come with a sting.
I wanted to also share about how I myself had a breech birth… but mine would have silenced the conversation. I didn’t tell them that my 24 week old baby girl was breech when she entered the world. I could have recounted about the doctor’s comments on how she was surprisingly born in her sack, perfectly intact and that she only took one push! My heart would not have been able to keep back from telling about each precious minute we had with our daughter as she made effort to breath with her underdeveloped lungs.
I spoke nothing about the sharp pain I felt over breech births and the memories that came along with them. Some might say “Tell your story openly! You need to be honest and real!” And others may say “It is best to keep those heart memories sacred.” And I can agree with both statements. But only under one condition: Does it bring them to Jesus?
In the last year having lost 2 babies within 9 months, it can be so hard to do life with people without running into stinging subjects. Every topic has potential to bring a reminder to your story. And everyone has a story to tell. As believers, we are commanded to do life together, displaying and exemplifying the unity and love God has within Himself! This is a high calling! How can we handle such a thing with so many different “stings” we hold within?
Sister, you have been given a gift. Not only a new identity in Christ, a rock beneath your feet, and a salvation kept in heaven for you… but you have also been given a specific story to tell that is different than others. This is not for the purpose of getting eyes to look at you though. Your story is most beautiful when it is used like a window into seeing God’s great glory! They see Jesus more clearly in you because your life has a different “sting” than they themselves carry, and it is your opportunity to use that God-given story to point them to CHRIST. You are telling HIS story now. Not your own. Our gift – happy stories, and hard stories – are to point the world to the feet of Jesus! Don’t lose that opportunity by turning the attention to your pain or your happiness!
Instead of telling all about my hurting experience with breech birth, I was able to treasure the lives of these children who I still see and will watch grow up! And, when the time is right – I also share about my breech birth to let people in and to exude the fragrance of Christ within my community. These mothers’ stories are not less or more important than mine, but they are essential. Their happy story and my hard story in unity together – tell GOD’s story. By sitting in fellowship, loving one another and caring for each other’s needs, you ignite what ONLY Jesus can do: make one. Caring for your sister may mean keeping your story close. And caring for your sister may also mean sharing your pain with others – but BOTH should cause the name of Jesus to shine in your midst.
I ask this: Does the gospel change your life? This my friend is your proving ground – Life. Does it exemplify Jesus or does it exemplify yourself? Each stage – pregnancy, singleness, marriage, infertility, sickness… is an opportunity God has allowed you to walk through to show His great sufficiency and to build one another up in Him. What a gift! Use them well sisters, use them well.
Emily Muckleroy is a wife and mother who seeks to see Jesus lifted up in every big and small area of life. Using the pathway of everyday life experiences, she and her husband co-write on their blog, Homemaking in Heaven. It’s purpose is to dive into all kinds of topics that exhort the body of Christ to be fixed on Jesus. They live in beautiful northern CO.