Heather Cofer

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Grace-Filled Planning for the New Year

30 Dec

It was five years ago when my husband dove headlong into planning and preparing for a new year, and he was hooked.

I chuckled more than once as I watched him; surrounded by books, spending hours enthusiastically reading, going through a planning course, and filling out a corresponding planner with goals. Whenever he would catch me chuckling at him he would say, “You should do this, too!” I would quickly respond, “Nope, I’m good. This is your thing.” He is naturally a dreamer, and I am not. But a year later I found myself sitting next to him, notebook in hand, watching the same year-planning course with a lot of trepidation and a sliver of excitement.

Now, I truly love order and structure and systems; having boxes to work inside of helps me feel safe and effective. So you would think that planning and goal-setting would naturally be exciting for me. But, it’s not. It makes me nervous. And it was only recently that I was able to put words as to why. Simply said:

I am afraid of having another un-accomplished task staring me in the face as evidence that I am a failure.

Finding my worth in what I do or in how well I do it has always been a weak point for me. Although I would tell you that I believe my worth is found in Christ, I too often subconsciously default to fleshly thinking. I find myself discouraged and full of guilt when the laundry falls behind, when a flaw is found in my writing, when I have a parenting blunder, or when my husband tells me the food doesn’t have quite enough salt. But amazingly, the very thing I thought would cause more condemnation—namely goal-planning—has actually been used as a tool by God to begin transforming my mindset toward work, goals, taking risks, falling short, getting better, and not being afraid of an unfinished task. 

How so? I’ll do my very best to tell you. 

God-Centered Planning Brings Success

Proverbs 16:3 says,

“Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.”

As I’ve embarked on this yearly planning journey these past four years, I’ve learned more and more that wise, humble, diligent planning honors the Lord. When we do our work with the desire for God to be glorified, we will work with more excitement, more intentionality, and more joy regardless of the outcome.

Does this mean that we will always succeed in accomplishing what we set out to do? No. Often the unexpected happens, or we realize we misjudged an aspect of our planning, or God simply closes a door. But whether we end up finishing as expected or things change along the way, we will have gone so much farther than if we wander aimlessly and just “hope” to achieve something. 

I know some of us might feel a little bit gun-shy to make goals after this past year of craziness. It can be tempting to wonder what the point of planning is if everything is just going to get thrown out the window. However, when we are already in the mode of seeking to plan for God’s glory, He will help us adjust along the way to whatever curve balls come. Again, it isn’t ultimately about the outcome of our planning, but the desire to live intentionally for the glory of God. Nothing done out of love for and obedience to Him will be in vain.

Having Vision Brings Life 

Proverbs 29:18a says,

“Where there is no vision, the people perish.” (KJV)

If you look at the verse in other translations, it’s quite clear it means a spiritual vision. When we have a clear vision for living for God and furthering His kingdom on earth, we will be diligent in living that out. In times when the practicals of living out that vision are unclear, we are pressed to seek the Lord more urgently which is always a good thing. And, not only will we have vision for the “big” things in life, but we will also have a vision for the daily faithfulness we are called to as believers according to Scripture. 

As a wife and mom, having a Christ-centered vision keeps my work of homemaking, discipling and caring for my children, being a faithful helper to my husband, and loving those who come through our doors purposeful. It helps get me back on track when I become lax. It reminds me that the everyday moments of life build on one another, and are all a part of impacting this world for God’s glory. So, whether it’s a goal of revamping my household chore schedule or having a reading list, or working on getting my girls in dance class, all of it can aid in my ultimate vision of living intentionally for my Savior. 

Acknowledging Weakness Brings Strength

I’ve always had a hard time allowing others to see my weaknesses, which ultimately comes down to pride. But it’s stressful and exhausting to try to hide areas of needed growth. And, when I do stare an area of weakness in the face, it often feels impossible to go about changing it, so I cop out and just say, “It is what it is.” When this mindset is allowed to remain, it trickles over into every aspect of life, from my spiritual growth to my relationships to my work and beyond. 

James 4:6 says,

“But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” 

I have learned that there is so much freedom in humbling myself, acknowledging my weaknesses (first to the Lord, then to others), and allowing myself to be both taught and grown. God gives us grace to receive instruction and take steps toward needed change when we are humble before Him. Humility brings freedom and joy that pride never can. 

In this learning process 2 Corinthians 12:9 has become one of my favorite verses. 

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

Our weakness is the perfect place for Christ’s power to be displayed. And I’ve been learning that rather than being afraid for others to see my weakness, it becomes an opportunity to tell of His goodness, His faithfulness, and His mercy as He grows and changes me. It puts Him on the throne of my life and puts my ego in its rightful place: at His feet. This is what brings true and lasting freedom. The fear of failing loses some of its sting as I remember that there will always be abundant grace for me as I am living in repentance, being sanctified until the day I reach eternity. 

Now, your process of living intentionally and planning for what is ahead will look differently than mine. We are created in beautifully unique ways with minds that are wired a bit differently, so I don’t want to give you super specific methods on how you should go about planning for the New Year. However, I wanted to share a few simple ideas that are very helpful, and can be done very easily. 

  • Write down your goals. It’s been shown that we are far more likely to remember something when we write it down (see link to article below). Write them in a place you are likely to see them on a regular basis, whether it’s a notebook or planner, or maybe on a whiteboard. It doesn’t need to be very many – you can start with one or two that are the most important for you. It could be a habit (i.e. spending time in God’s Word every day) or it could be a specific project you want to accomplish (i.e. organize a closet). But this way they will be kept at the forefront of your mind, and you can begin to break those down and take small steps toward those things that are important to you. 
  • Share your goals with someone. If you are married, your spouse is a great person to share with. Or, for you it might be a good friend who is also working toward some goals, and you can cheer one another on in the process. It could also be a mentor who you know will hold you accountable in a loving way (especially with habit goals). Whatever your situation, ask God to show you will help you live intentionally for His glory. 
  • Consider investing in a planner. There are a myriad of options out there, with various structures that fit different personalities or goal-types. My husband and I have been using the Full Focus Planner for quite some time, and love it. I’m also using the Cultivate Power Sheets this year along with it. Take some time to do your research and figure out what might be a good fit for you. 
    I also have some friends who prefer to use a plain notebook to jot things down that they need to remember or accomplish. It’s not one-size-fits-all, and there is freedom to try new things until you find something that works well for you.

Finally, I want to leave you with a few words of encouragement. 

  • Commit your upcoming year to the Lord, and allow Him to lead you. 
  • Ask Him to show you what living intentionally looks like in your specific circumstances. 
  • Don’t be afraid to admit where you need growth, and ask God to show you how best to allow Him to grow and change you. 
  • And most importantly, seek God with all your heart. Make Him your number one goal. A truly, eternally intentional life comes from making Jesus our aim, our pursuit, and our passion. 

I am cheering you on, friend, as you step into this new year.

If this post encouraged you, would you consider sharing it so it can reach more women? Many thanks!

Article link:

https://www.lifesavvy.com/19204/why-you-remember-things-better-when-you-write-them-down/

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As I watch the happenings in this world I have an As I watch the happenings in this world I have an ever-increasing ache—a yearning—to be known first and foremost by my allegiance to Jesus Christ.

As I read headlines, hot takes, opinions, debates between fellow believers—praying and seeking to learn and discern—I’m more certain than ever that being a Christian frees us from being defined by or confined to earthly labels in our stances on any given issue. We’re free to champion what God champions, to despise what God despises regardless of how it might be viewed by those around us or what political lines it might cross. We’re free to love those who differ from us, and yes, even free to love those who do us wrong. 

I have strong opinions and thoughts about certain issues—no doubt about it. I disagree with certain thoughts or opinions fellow believers hold. But what I want those brothers and sisters to know about me *first* is that I love them, not how I might disagree with them. Yes, there’s a place to discuss, to sharpen one another, to exhort and encourage, to warn and even to rebuke at times when we see fellow believers straying from Christ. But the world is supposed to know us by our love for each other, not our debates and conflicts. This should temper the “what,” “how,” and “when” of every conversation. 

Some of us are called to stand more publicly against certain evils and injustices than others. We should expect the best of those who aren’t doing or saying exactly what we’re doing or saying (*especially* if we’re defining them by their lack of words on social media. There are faithful Christians who will never say a word about current issues online, but are obeying in word and deed in their in-person spheres). That said, this should *never* be used as an excuse to neglect the actions and words that every Christ-follower must be marked by according to Scripture. And when we find ourselves hesitating to obey any of God’s commands due to another allegiance something needs to change.

Lord, may your people be defined not by causes, but by Christ; not by worldly labels, but by you alone.
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#lookingtoJesus #thegospelchangeseverything #Christcenteredwomanhood
I’ve been thinking about my little fuchsia plant I’ve been thinking about my little fuchsia plant the past few days. I snipped and propagated it from a stunning outdoor hanging plant we had a couple years ago after it scorched in the intense CO sun. After weeks of daily watching I finally saw the roots appear, and replanted it. Fuchsia is special to me, because it’s one of the plants that beautified our windowsills in Mongolia throughout our years there. I love having one in our home.

Recently, though, did a little trimming of this plant. I noticed there were a couple of overly flourishing sprigs; they were so long they were keeping the little plant from filling out. So, as much as I hated to do it, I clipped them off. To my delight, brand new leaves began appearing within days all over the plant.

Why has this been on my mind?  Because it reminded me that sometimes—in order for us to flourish—we need to clip back areas in our lives that are zapping growth. It’s often a painful decision, because they’re usually pastimes or vocations we love. But we know in order to direct time and energy toward our God-given priorities we need to do a little clipping of those gangly offshoots. Although we feel bare for a time, it doesn’t take long for the evidence of growth and life to show itself where it was much needed. 

And guess what? Those clipped offshoots are sitting in a jar in the kitchen, waiting to sprout new roots. They aren’t gone forever, just being prepped to produce life rather than zap it. Sometimes branches do need to be clipped and tossed. Other times they just need to be propagated—waiting for new roots to grow so they can grow and flourish at the right time in the right way.

“Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.” John 15:2
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#lookingtoJesus #plants #Christcenteredwomanhood #fuchsia #ponderings #lessonseverywhere
//Well, it’s all an adventure That comes with a //Well, it’s all an adventure
That comes with a breathtaking view
Walking a tightrope
With you//

The incredible @frostedphotographer took some headshots for us, and she said, “Do you want to snap a few together?” Yes, please. 😍😍😍

Forever thankful for the gift of a life adventure with this man.
//Summer and winter and springtime and harvest, Su //Summer and winter and
springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon, and stars in their
courses above,
Join with all nature in 
manifold witness
to Thy great faithfulness,
mercy, and love//
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#greatisthyfaithfulness #lookingtoJesus #springtime
“Being like Jesus” will never contradict the r “Being like Jesus” will never contradict the rest of Scripture.

Several times as of late I’ve read or heard examples of people using stories of Jesus from the gospels to back up an argument about accepting sin of some kind. They say that if His followers are going to be like Him they need to follow His example—His example by their interpretation, that is.

But the narratives told of Jesus in the Gospels will *never* contradict the specific commands Christ-followers are given in the rest of the New Testament. Jesus never justified a sin we’re commanded to repent of. A sinful attitude never laced His words, no matter how matter-of-fact His rebukes were. Jesus is the Word made flesh. He will never go against His character or commands for His people.

We can be hard-line on sin while being gentle and kind. We can show compassion without compromising truth. We can be loving while holding fast to biblical convictions. We can, and we must.

Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. Changing Him in any way for our own gain—whether that’s for fleshly gratification or out of fear of others—is making a Jesus in our image. This is a Jesus who cannot save. 

But we have a Jesus who *can* save, who needs no re-making. May we, by His grace, be ever-conforming to Him.
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#lookingtoJesus #Christcenteredwomanhood #Christcenteredliving #truth #love #Jesusislife
“Only God Himself fully appreciates the influenc “Only God Himself fully appreciates the influence of a Christian mother in the molding of character in her children.” 
-Billy Graham

I know without a doubt this is true of my mom. This side of heaven I’ll have no idea what depths her godly influence and faithfulness has had upon me as a wife, mom, and woman in any sphere. I will never forget her telling us, “I’m so thankful I get to spend my days with you.” To have the assurance we were loved and enjoyed on top of all she did for our physical needs was a priceless gift. And, as I prepared to enter into adulthood she not only mentored me, but invited me into friendship with her. There aren’t words to sum up that kind of honor.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom. Thank you for being willing to love and follow Jesus in whatever He’s asked of you. There is nothing greater you could’ve given to us. I love you.
“My frame was not hidden from you, when I was be “My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth. 
Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.” Psalm 139:15-16

At the end of every baby book I make for my kids I include a picture of their ultrasound next to a picture of them at a year old. I want them to have no doubt that they have been loved dearly from the moment we found out about them, before we could see them with our own eyes. I want them to know that their lives are gifts, and always have been. I want them to know that every bit of morning sickness, every ache and pain, every labor and delivery, every sleepless night, every urgent care trip, every tear shed, every penny spent, every pursuit that’s been put on hold, every extra mess, every lingering effect on my body are beyond worth it for the privilege of being their mama. For the kiddos who were a surprise to us, I want them to know God knew infinitely better than we did the timing for another child, filling our lives with delight. I want to combat any lie that the enemy and the world that would tell them they’re an inconvenience, a hindrance, a “Plan B,” with assurances of my love and—more importantly—God’s love and perfect plan for them.

I want my children to know I wouldn’t trade them for any career, any worldly accolades, any convenience, any fortune, any temporary ease. They have been used by God as tools to reveal and root out sin, to flood my weakness with the grace of God, to increase my joy. 

On this Mother’s Day weekend, I just want to say: thank you, Lord, for the undeserved gift of my children.
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#gratefulmama #mothersday #childrenareagift #fearfullyandwonderfullymade
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